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THEY GOOSE THE PRESS, DON'T THEY?
(AKA: HOW I LEARNED TO START WORRYING AND LOVE BI PORN.)

Jason takes us on the set of Stable Entertainment's grandest bisexual feature to date, "Goosed 3: A Bisexual Love Affair" where he himself gets goosed more than once by some of the hottest performers in adult entertainment today.

1. Director-cum-pornstress Tina Tyler is blonde and ambitious. 2. Blake, Tina, and Keri prepare for the big scene! 3. "Oh wow! That was easy."4. Blake: "What are you DOING back there?!" 4. Blake: "What are you DOING back there?!"
5. Keri decides to sit back and take it all in... so to speak. 6. "Girls who like toys who like boys who like toys..." 7. Blake Harper in high school.

After yesterday's festivities I arrive on-set Wednesday morning prepared for anything. It's a good thing, too.

First up at bat this morning is director Tina Tyler donning a blonde wig for her scene opposite Keri Windsor and Blake Harper. This is Keri and Blake's second scene together, though this is the highly publicized (thanks to me) part of the film where Keri tries her hand and a dildo! at a position atop Blake's beautiful ass. Keri's tongue, fingers, and toy run wild all over Blake's derrière while he gets it on with Tina Tyler. Two girls in two days for Blake! That's just about as many as he's done in his entire life. Could we see the 2001 GayVN Performer of the Year making a B-line for bisex films in the future? Or even straight films perhaps? One thing's for sure, he's enjoying the variety!

"I was always curious as to exactly what a woman wants when a man goes down on her," says Blake.

"So a few years ago," interrupts Tina, "we met up and I gave him a little impromptu instructional." The two of them turn red and giggle like a couple of naughty schoolgirls who have been caught with their panties at their ankles. "Needless to say, I've been waiting for this scene for quite a while." It is difficult, however, for Tina to direct the scene while she's actually starring in it. "The only real problem is that I can't see what's going on at the monitor. I don't know what looks good and what doesn't look good, but if you're working with a team of people you trust then you can focus on your acting when you're on camera. Fortunately, I have that."

8. The one and only, Hans Ebson! 9. Han's cheeky monkey shot. 10. Aww... just one big happy family! Hans, Dru, and Brady. 11. Dru Berrymore teases Brady while Hans watches!

In Blake's post orgasmic bliss, I exit the stage and enter the makeup room where Hans Ebson is getting touched up. I hear him and the producer, Eddie, whispering about me and pretend I can't hear a thing. I figured it must all be good things because there was a mirror right in front of me and I was looking pretty fierce.

"Will you be my fluffer?" asks Hans, just as though he were asking if I had a stick of gum or perhaps a breath mint he could borrow. Of course, I think Hans meant it as a joke, but it was sweet and flattering still. It became so much more flattering when I discovered he really wasn't kidding at all. As I sit quietly amongst the set changes, sipping my tea and taking notes on everything that's happened thus far in the morning, I see Hans rear his head around the corner. He smiles. I smile. I point to my lap. He walks over and sits down. I massaged his back. He massages my dick through my jeans. Ahem, no problem getting Mr. Wonka to smile upon the world this morning apparently!

Eventually, Hans and I can't stand it anymore. We make a run for the secret bathroom where I do my best to lick his entire body from head to toe in the dark. Surely anyone who has had a scene with this Euro-stud would agree with me when I say that his ass just begs to be licked. Lucky for me, he enjoys that sort of thing and continued to ask me throughout the day to take my tongue to it time and time again. Truth be told, he wanted to fuck. Not that I didn't want to fuck, but I have a problem having meaningless sex with total strangers. (Clearly, I'm NOT meant to be a porn star!)That seemed to make Hans even more frustrated. The more frustrated he got, the more adorable he became. "Let's just fuck!" he'd say. When I would turn decline his invitation, he'd say, "Ok, then lick my ass!" That I could deal with for the most part.

Hans tells me he's been in the Los Angeles area for the past three years. What a coincidence, so have I! He also tells me of an ex-wife and child he has on the other side of the country. Where is this? None other than Sarasota, Florida! What a coincidence, that's where I came from too! Our lives were so parallel, I can't help but think that everyone I share a soul with him or something.

12. Dru Berrymore glams it up for a photo shoot. 13. If Drew Barrymore and Ashley Judd could breed... 14. Wouldn't you diddle yourself in front of the mirror too?
15. Dru gets nekkid! 16. Dru spreads her legs. 17. "Miss Berrymore's ready for her close-up!"

Dru Berrymore, while not as sexually active towards me as our bad boy Hans, was also turning me on hardcore. There are moments when she looks like a long lost twin of her mainstream namesake and there are moments when she looks like she's too beautiful to ever be compared to anyone. Her scene giving head to Brady Martin with Hans Ebson is short-lived, but lots of fun. Dru and Hans fight over his cock to see who can suck better dick: men or women? You'll have to catch the film to find out the answer. But I think we all know the answer isn't men or women... it's just Jason! Jason gives better head than all the rest. Or so I've been told. Ask Hans! He'll tell you. Of course, is what I'm quickly discovering in the typical gay porn star fashion, he too left the building before saying adios to his faithfully devoted fluffer boy. Dissed again!

18. Stocking fetish, anyone? 19. FLASH! 20. FLASH AGAIN! 21. Keri's perfect pair
22. Keri's adorable little bum. 23. "Whose tongue is longer?" 24. Keri: "Mine is!"

Cinematographer and GayVN award winning director Walsh Welsh took my "work" with Hans as being an open audition apparently. He approached me regarding a film he's doing for Studio 2000 in June. "I need to cast somebody in this sex scene opposite a newcomer. Is that something you'd be interested in?" I was speechless. I have never received this kind of attention in my life. Does Donald von Wiedenman actually pay the talent and crew extra to be nice to press or something? I always suspected he was a brilliant man!

Anyway, I explained to Walsh that I wasn't interested in doing adult films at the moment, but that if I were to ever get into them I'd want to choose my own scene partners. As for Studio 2000, they do a lot of work with Jeff White, Ethan Marc, and Tony Donovan. "If you were to invite me to come work with any one of them," I told him, "it would be really difficult for me to turn you down!" He said he'd see what he could arrange and will be calling.

25. "Scuse me, something in here needs to breathe." 26. Tuck Johnson thinks about using the "F" word. 27. Tuck Johnson thinks about using the "F" word.

And what better way to end a three-day shoot than with a jack off scene from GayVN Award Winning Tuck Johnson? Tuck and I simulated anal sex backstage during an interview at the awards ceremony last February for AVNLive.com. I'm not sure he had any idea who I was then and I'm not sure he has any idea who I am now. He kept to himself most of the day. He did bring a delightful lad along with him, who helped him in keeping his wood throughout the shoot, and would make a good porn star himself should be want to get in the business. (Hint: Tuck, get a percentage!)

So ends my latest on-set review. I've seen Blake Harper fuck a woman, Keri Windsor top a man, I've witnessed bisexual film on the rise, I've witnessed Hans Ebon literally on the rise, I've been molested by Jacob Hayes, I've questioned my career, and I've even had my heartbroken when I had to bid everyone a fond adieu. I'm pretty sure that as long as I live, I will never forget my three days of debauchery on the set of Stable Entertainment's "Goosed 3: A Bisexual Love Affair."

If nothing else, I've decided I'm going to produce and star in my own bisexual porno this year. The title: "Fuck the Press!"

Just kidding.

 

POST SCRIPT: I did meet up with Jacob Hayes again. The next night actually! I went to a club called Rage in West Hollywood (which I make a point to never frequent ironically) with a few friends. Within the first 60 seconds of me walking in the door, I ran into Jacob. Was it fate or mere happenstance? Whatever it was, we did a little bump and grind (and then some) on the dance floor for a good hour... and this time, both of us were hard as a rock. Just trust me.

 

FEATURING: Blake Harper, Keri Windsor, Asia Carerra, Shanna McCullough, Matt Bradshaw, Jacob Hayes, Pepper, Dru Berrymore, Hans Ebson, Tina Tyler, Tuck Johnson, and Nina Hartley. Dir: Tina Tyler.
 
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